November 2006 Cover
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By
Giacomo Tramontagna
Rear Guard Soldiers
Rating: 1 Star
No technical credits provided. Starring Bernardo Arony, Andrey, Felix Lins, Rena Fabregati, Bruno Ferraz, Gabriel Samyer, Alessandro, and Alex Bad Boy.
How to order
"It was the bomb!" says a smirky young man describing a bygone fling with a strapping young fireman. The real bomb is this recent release from Colossal Entertainment. As four guys swap lame reminiscences about their liaisons with men in uniform, technical shoddiness
even extends to the central fetish. Two of the military tricks wear fatigues that look like pajamas; a Marine appears in a get-up that looks borrowed from an ice-cream vendor; the firefighter wears a red t-shirt and cap. The awkward sex has little to offer besides fits of almost
angry fucking, and a moment where a model's nose gets streaked with spooge. The dialogue is in Portuguese; subtitles offer such translations as "You promess
[sic] me you're gonna suck it good?" and "Ah! That's a big
load." Anyone who investigates the fourth episode will
discover that the scene breaks off before it's over, and a surreal flash of straight porn appears before the screen goes dark. (Viewers have reported this problem online, confirming
that The Guide's review copy isn't uniquely defective.)
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