Dirty Dishes	Dirty Dishes Archive

An alert reader in New York was kind enough to send Dawn several news clips relating to the latest lunacy of the "perpetual" War on Terrorism....

It seem that three sailors from the tiny Pacific nation of Kiribati were returning home on a Cathay Pacific plane when they aroused suspicions of the Paris/Hong Kong flight crew by scurrying off to the aircraft's crapper before the flight had even departed. They had with them, according to flight attendants, "strange-looking documents."

Upon inspecting the toilets, the flight crew reported finding "suspicious white drops" left behind by the trio. The police were summoned, and the terrorist suspects were hustled off the plane.

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A search of the "strange-looking" documents revealed them to be nothing more than porn magazines, lending credence to the would-be-bombers claim that they had visited the john only to whack off, a story that would also explain the "suspicious white drops" that had alarmed the flight crew. (One would think that stewardesses of either gender would be familiar enough with spurted spunk to not deem such "suspicious," but since thetragiceventsofseptembereleventh....)

The French pilot refused to allow the JO artists back on the plane, stranding them in Paris. In the United States, of course, the masturbaters would have risked possible incommunicado incarceration for years, enough time for Herr Ashcroft to recriminalize self-abuse.